chasing donna

a mile-by-mile account of running a half-marathon
By:Morgan Henley
From: EU Jacksonville
Date: February 2008

Thanks to our good friend Donna Deegan at First Coast News (channel 12 for those who recognize the value of remembering things through numbers) the National Marathon to Fight Breast Cancer has been on every Jacksonville runner’s to do list since last year when it was announced. Not only did it bring out the usual Jacksonville running scene, it drew thousands from the 904 area code. So, along with other runners (and DONNA!), I opted for the half-marathon to support the fight against breast cancer.
Backed by sponsor after sponsor, the race proceeds went entirely to breast cancer research and to help give financial assistance to underpriveledged breast cancer patients. It’s about time Jacksonville got a decent run for a good charitable cause… running for the further benefit of Gate petroleum is a little less inspiring.
Now, I would be lying and embarrassing myself if I qualified myself as an “experienced runner.” This was my second half-marathon, I’ve got three seasons of cross country under my belt, three shining Gate River Run finisher medals, and two oversized XXXL Summer Beach Run T-shirts. But this run came at a great time. I was still in shape from the Thanksgiving Day Outback half-marathon and had a desire to work off those Christmas calories, so I readily planned to join the hordes of runners running the first-ever breast cancer marathon.

february 15th
day before the run

expo: In need of registering for the race, I was forced to go to the Morocco Shrine Center to sign up. Touché race organizers, the Morocco Shrine Center? I thought the only thing they used that place for was Jewelry Expos! I parked as far away as I could, just to prove that I loved long distances. (Okay, there was nowhere else to park.) Donna definitely knew what she was doing when organizing this shin dig. Pink balloons, pink carpet, pink EVERYTHING. Except for the millions of blue-shirted volunteers, you almost felt like a bottle of Pepto-Bismol exploded, leaving no prisoners behind.
The race bag you got for signing up for the event was a jackpot! It came with a brownie with Donna’s name on it! An eco-friendly water bottle, a pink bandana, and a race shirt that actually fit! For some reason, race organizers normally like to overlook the fact that almost 80% of the participants are Adult-Small-shirt-wearing, petite women and order two times as many XXL Adult T-shirts as Smalls. The goodie bag got even better, it had Donna Hicken’s own book, The Good Fight. And as if that wasn’t awesome enough, she was there to sign it! I couldn’t believe it. I got to see the wonder anchor herself. It was magical to say the least.
night before: I ate an entire pot of spaghetti, because for runners, carbs are actually good! I also drank three times my own weight in water and went straight to bed to get the recommend 12 hours of sleep before the race.

february 16th
day of run!

the shuttle: Get to the Morocco Shrine at 6:30 AM to get the shuttle to the Mayo Clinic. I park even farther than the day before, I’m really proving my love for the mileage now. I immediately realize how underdressed I had come! Not only was I not wearing some kind of pink tutu over my race shorts, I wasn’t even wearing pink. I could feel the disapproving eyes. Disney World had nothing on this line to load the buses.
start of race: Armed with a running partner and a Garmin GPS-System, pace-watching, mileage-counting watch, I was ready to run! My legs were stretched and I was as ready to go as ever. I crammed an energy bar in minutes before the race hoping I wouldn’t see it again in the form of dehydration barf. The gun went off and pink confetti filled the air. The race was on!
miles 1-3: I’ve always wanted to run up the on ramp of JTB. What better place to run on than a black paved road that directly faces the sun. And then, I have to double check to make sure the sweat in my eyes isn’t deceiving me, I see Donna and hubby and fellow super-anchor Tim Deegan! It can’t be true. What better way to start the race? Considering I don’t even like driving over this highway, running over it isn’t much better. I never noticed how deceitfully uneven this roadway was, I think my feet are a little confused.
mile 4: The spectator crowd is really getting into it. These runner moms really convinced their husbands and kids to come out. I run by signs like, “I hate cancer. Save the boobies!” and past spectators with speakers blaring ‘Chariots of Fire’. Note for next year: get more mega speakers blaring cheesy inspirational music.
mile 5-6: This one’s on the beach. Almost as uneven of a surface as JTB, I guess race organizers thought it would be a challenge to the run. Sweat is really getting into eyes and my ponytail is starting to whip me in the face. Horrifying images of my hairband breaking fill my head and slow me down.
miles 7-9: Ahh, past the halfway point! Running past dining spectators enjoying early morning cocktails is somewhat tortuous. I run past some spectators playing beer bong and offering beer to the runners, so I chug one for good measure. Then I see a pair of girls wearing shirts that say “Save Second Base.” Note: make the same shirt for next year. Around every five seconds I hear the chime of the Garmin going off on other runner’s watches telling them to speed up.
mile 10-11: Back up JTB. Going up the on ramp curve is not nearly as much fun. I see a non-race-participant – a roller blader who’s utilizing the car-free JTB. I’m pretty much completely blind from sweat now and getting constant whiffs of sweaty men running close by.
mile 12: Last to go! Show-offy finishers who’ve already completed their run come up to cheer.
mile 13: The adrenaline is about to burst through for that last 1/10th of a mile sprint to the finish!
mile 13.1: Collapse. Brought back to consciousness by a Passion Fruit Citrus Life Water, Gatorade-ripoff beverage. Wished it was cold.
post race: Vowing never to take my medal off, I walk around the “Runner’s Village” post race celebration. I chug four Vitamin Waters, three Powerades, and at least five Dasanis. I also Scarfed down a bagel, an apple and a banana. Great run, or is that all of my endorphins fooling me? I hear that the first marathon runner has come in only minutes after I finished the half, what a show off.